One Word No
by ladyjane6313
Summary: What would life have been like for Ianto Jones if Captain Jack Harkness had not offered him the job of 'butler'.


No

When Ianto had stopped Jack in the street to attend to the pterodactyl and they'd planned the capture of the creature. When Jack had been flung up into the air still attached to the dinosaur, and Ianto had watched shocked and a little concerned for Jack. When Jack fell down from the rafts of the warehouse and Ianto had tried to catch him, which resulted in them both landing hard on the floor. When the dinosaur dropped from the mid-air and narrowly missed both men thanks to Jack's quick manoeuvres.

When Ianto walked away from Jack a little flustered and feeling incredibly guilty for what he'd felt lay on Jack's chest. Jack stared at the retreating figure and stated loudly, "Sorry Ianto…The answer is no."

Ianto turned back quickly, all guilt replaced by fury.

"What do you mean, "No"? Doesn't this prove that I can handle a tough situation?"

"I'm afraid not. I'm sorry but you just don't seem right for the Torchwood I'm building." Ianto walked away in disgust.

Everyday after the capture of the flying dinosaur Ianto turned up at the Hub on the dock and presented Jack with coffee, then he left. No words passed between them even though Jack was tempted. Jack accepted the coffee and nothing more happened. Then one day it stopped. Ianto stopped turning up in the mornings. He stopped bringing coffee. Coffee which Jack had instantly took a liking to. Jack began to regret his harsh words on that fateful night. But when he went to find Ianto his neighbour said he hadn't been around for weeks and new tenants had moved into his apartment. Through every connection he had Jack couldn't trace Ianto, even to apologise.

Ianto had decided to give Jack what he'd asked for when he'd stood in front of the SUV in the rain all those nights ago. He knew that Torchwood Cardiff was his only hope of saving Lisa. She'd slowly began to deteriorate and without the sufficient power that the Torchwood Institute could provide, he watched her die slowly, in his arms.

Devastated Ianto had packed up his belongings and sent them to charity shops and his family with a note. Then he'd walked to the harbour one quiet evening and jumped off the wall into the ice cold water. He'd weighed his pockets down with stones and pebbles. When the water covered his head he didn't try to swim to the surface, neither did he fight when he drifted into the unknown. As he got halfway down he dropped into unconsciousness. Nobody ever saw Ianto Jones again.

Two months after Ianto had walked into the water, a package arrived at the Hub addressed to Captain Jack Harkness. Owen picked up the package and took it to Jack's office. Jack stared at the handwriting for a minute then tore into the wrapping. Inside was a suit. On further inspection Jack made the connection and he realised where he'd seen it. On Ianto the last time he'd spent more than 30 minutes with him. As he picked the suit out of the wrapping a handwritten note fluttered to the table. Jack knew what it said before he'd even seen the first sentence.

_Dear Jack,_

_Enclosed is the suit you liked so much. Not your size I realise but I'm sure you could get it altered. _

_While you are reading this you must realise why I sent it? You won't be seeing me again, just as you demanded. At least a part of me got to be inside Torchwood Cardiff._

_I had no other option, though I guess it would be nice if my parents could hold a funeral with an occupied casket instead of an empty one._

_You were my last hope to try to set things right, but you refused me, and now all is lost. Once Lisa was gone there was no point. If you'd just given me a chance then maybe we both could have won. _

_Anyway…you'll find me at the harbour on the ocean floor. The note to my family doesn't tell them this, for obvious reasons. If I could ask you one thing? Please attend the funeral. Just explain to my family about Lisa and tell them how much I loved them._

_For someone I've only met a few times and know next to nothing about this is a very intimate suicide note. But I felt a connection to you that for that one moment made me feel alive again._

_I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to know you better._

_Yours faithfully_

_Ianto Jones_

_Formerly of Torchwood London_

Jack fell back in his chair, the suit crumpled in his hands, unseen. What had he done? With one word he'd destroyed a young man's life. A young man who could see no other option for his girlfriend – his first true love – or himself.

Jack had never felt so ashamed. It took a moment but Jack made up his mind to find Ianto himself, instead of sending his team out.

He took a boat from storage out onto the harbour and used some old salvage equipment his team had found near Swansea. It took him over 48 straight hours, but after searching every square inch of the bottom of the harbour seas and trying to predict the tides and currents Jack found him. He dived in and pulled him from the bottom. For one instant Jack believed he'd seen Ianto's spirit overlapped with his body and it smiled at him, but Jack couldn't be sure. He passed the body to the Police anonymously and waited for the obituary in his parents local newspaper.

Jack hadn't gotten the suit altered as he stood in the cemetery and watched as Ianto's body was lowered into the ground. He heard a woman crying inconsolably and saw an older man who had Ianto's eyes and smile comfort her as tears slid silently down his cheeks.

As the priest finished his sermon and the mourners slowly dispersed, Jack made his way to the hole in the ground. Gently he laid the suit over the coffin and threw some dirt onto it. He stood slowly and found Ianto's parents staring at this stranger in an RAF uniform.

Jack caught a look in Ianto's mother's eyes that indicated she somehow knew who Jack was and why he was here. Jack walked towards them and offered his condolences. Ianto's mother questioned him and Jack explained everything he could. He felt he owed them at least that. When he had finished they thanked him and told him to stay in touch. Ianto's mother gave Jack a damp piece of paper which he slipped in to his pocket.

Jack returned to the Hub late and found it thankfully empty. He sat in his office with a bottle of brandy and a full glass and took out the paper Ianto's mum had handed to him. He knew it was Ianto's note to them. He opened it and read it.

_Dear Mum and Dad,_

_I'm sorry you have to read this and find out like this, but there was no other way. I love you both very much and didn't want to put you through this, but I had to. Lisa meant everything to me and now I'm lost. But this way we can be together now, forever._

_I met a man before I died. He is a hard fighting, intelligent, courageous man who has a good heart, but has been burned and doesn't trust easily. He was my only hope but he let me down. I don't blame him for this. He'll be the one to retrieve my body and I've asked him to attend my funeral. Please talk to him and treat him like a friend. He doesn't have too many I think._

_Maybe you could swap stories? He'll tell you all you need to know about how and why I died. _

_Look after each other and I'll be watching over you._

_Lots of Love_

_Ianto xx_

Jack cried for the first time in years. Although Ianto had said he didn't blame him it was all his fault. If only he hadn't said 'No' to employing him then none of this would have happened.

Jack took his webley gun from his belt. He placed it on the table next to the discarded note to Ianto's parents. He downed what was left in his glass and quickly picked up his gun, placing it to his temple. A second before he pulled the trigger, like a moment between life and death Jack could have sworn he'd seen Ianto holding out his arms to him, pleading with him to not pull the trigger. Jack closed his eyes and pulled.


End file.
